Anonymous asked: So, do you just not understand that you act like a prat, or are you merely ignoring the fact that you are, in fact, a prat?
Or I’m just ignoring all the other prats like you.
(You realise that Sherlock is sulking in a corner now, Anon?)
Anonymous asked: Did you have a favorite story as a kid?
The Ugly Duckling.
Alternatively, The Bible.
Anonymous asked: If you can tell a good Chinese restaurant by the bottom part of the door handle, is there a good way to tell a good Italian restaurant?
The owner’s moustache.
Anonymous asked: What do you think of poetry? Do you have a favorite poem?
Poetry is interesting, although it depends on the poet that pens it. Often its deliberateness becomes mundane. I like Sylvia Plath and Percy Bysshe Shelley, and some of Wordsworth’s earlier works.
Anonymous asked: Have you ever been asked to babysit? Are you any good at it?
Nobody in their right minds would ask me to babysit their devil children.
Anonymous asked: How did you celebrate Valentine's Day?
I’ve been busy with cases, sorry. John went out with his latest conquest. I stayed home and played with hearts.
Pig hearts, I mean.
Anonymous asked: Do you like the snow?
I find it both fascinating and irritating.
Anonymous asked: Some would say that always stating the truth makes a person rude and ornery. Do you believe this, Mr. Holmes?
I don’t see people who are truthful as being irritable at all, although I do think they’re a bit silly.
Anonymous asked: In the last question someone asked you (even thought it was more of a statement), in the last two sentences, there needed to be a comma after the word Sherlock. Why did you not correct this?
Occasionally I come across moods that allow me to ignore my problems.
Anonymous asked: Sherlock, I am watching you. Sherlock I am coming. Sherlock I have found you.
Are you the one that’s installed the camera in the flat across the street?